If you’ve never had sex in a car, well, you might want to think about correcting it. Car sex, while once the territory of horny teenagers and horny teenagers alone, sits firmly on the list of “things every couple must try.” Why? Because variety is the spice of life and you’re not too old to revisit the hits. There’s much to be said for this hallmark of the unhoused youth: the thrill of getting caught, the change of scenery, and, yes, the essentialness of spontaneity. Car sex is also especially handy for parents, as moms and dads spend a gazillion hours in their vehicles driving, dropping off, and waiting for soccer games, music lessons, tutoring sessions, and playdates to end.
So, for parents with little time, open minds, and a sense of exhibitionism, the car presents an opportune time to pull off to a quiet spot and have a quickie. Now, uncomfortable car sex is definitely a thing, too. But with a few helpful car sex tips, you’ll steer clear of any issues. (Get it? Steer clear?) and realize that it can be great. Like, really great. Here, with help from Dr. Jill McDevitt, resident sexologist at Cal Exotics, Tara Struyk, co-founder of the sex-positive platform Kinkly, and Alicia Sinclair, sex educator and founder of the sex toy b-Vibe, are some tips for how to have car sex that’s fun and memorable. Just don’t forget to clear the squeezable yogurt packets and crushed Cheerios from the seats. Or not. You do you.
1. Try to Stay Seated
Based on the nature of the location, you might want to stick to sex positions that allow you to stay seated. Cowgirl, where your partner sits on your lap, is maybe the most obvious option. Try adjusting your seat so that the space can accommodate two bodies comfortably. Remember, you’re going to need enough room to allow your partner to climb atop, with their knees perched on the seat between the door and center console. For ultimate comfort, Dr. McDevitt suggests heading to the passenger seat. “It’s better than the driver-side because there’s more room without the steering wheel and no risk of your behind hitting the horn and drawing attention to yourself,” she says.
2. Put It In Reverse
Maybe you’re in the mood to try something a little more daring than the more standard positions. If that’s the case, think about ways you can reverse the norm. As mentioned above, cowgirl is great for car sex because it doesn’t require as much space as some other popular positions. Reverse cowgirl is no different. Situate yourself in the same way you would for the standard cowgirl position. But instead of having your partner facing you, you’re going to want them to face the opposite direction — almost as if they were about to sit on your lap, only, you know, naked. Yes, your partner will be looking out of the windshield. But least you’ll have a lookout.
3. Embrace the Car’s Accents
Sometimes, it’s not the position that makes sex great, but rather, the way in which you exercise them based on your surroundings. “I think the great thing about having sex in a car is that it provides some great props,” explains Struyk. “Seat belts can be used for gentle bondage. Strap your partner in or use the belt to wrap their hands around the headrest. If you’ve got a seat heater, try turning that up too to keep you both cozy. With a little creativity, you don’t need a crazy sex position,” she adds.
4. Take It to the Back
Okay, so maybe you’ve had enough with the whole “sitting upright” thing. In that case, head to the backseat where you’ll have some more space. It might not be the most comfortable platform on which to get down, but at least it gives you a little more room to mess around. Spooning is always a good option for the backseat. The position already caters to the idea of folding yourself into your partner, which is ideal for cramped quarters. “Lay on your sides in the back with the man as the big spoon with his back against the backrest,” suggests McDevitt. Besides, as we’ve previously reported, this position allows you to more easily control the pace of thrusts, which might help prevent any unfortunate falls, mishaps, or, ahem, bending.
5. Try Route 69
Another backseat option involves the classic 69. Lie down on your back and have your partner climb on top of you, straddling your face. “There are no acrobatics involved in this oral-focused move,” explains Sinclair. “It’s also the ultimate reciprocal move, so you can efficiently make sure that everyone gets a turn. Let the licking, sucking, and nibbles (if you’re into that) ensue — and feel free to incorporate your hands too,” she adds.
6. Give One Another a Hand
Of course, not all forms of sex have to involve penetration. Mutual masturbation is another great option for when you have neither space nor time on your side. “It’s still fun, orgasmic, and a lot easier in a car,” says McDervitt. “Sit in your respective seats in the front, reach on over and give each other a hand.”
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